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Finally Some Games That Count

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Being the hoops junkie that I am, many people are surprised when I tell them that I don’t watch preseason NBA basketball. Sure it’s an early peek at the rookies and NBA retreads who are fighting to make the rosters, but I just (metaphorically) can’t get it up for games that don’t count for anything.

What does surprise me is how little I missed the NBA this off-season. Opinionated hot takes of Kevin Durant’s departure aside, there was little to glean from checking the web everyday for NBA news. I watched nearly 300 games last season, and by the time Golden State choked away the NBA Finals, I needed a break from watching basketball. I thoroughly enjoyed living like a normal person this summer.

I did a little bit of traveling, read a few (basketball) books, moved cities, found a new full-time job, and spent some time with my non-basketball friends and family. But all that shit is over come Tuesday night. The season is starting, and despite the inevitable Dubs-Cavs Finals on the horizon, it will be an enjoyable one to watch. While most people were chomping at the bit, I’m of the belief that the season is starting at EXACTLY the right time. In fact, it was only a couple of days ago that I realized that opening night was on Tuesday–the off-season just flew by.

The reason I watch so much basketball is so that you don’t have to. There are tons of games to comb through, but I’m willing to step on any potential land mines so you can live the normal life that I can only dream about. I could have used maybe one more week to get my life together, but no matter; the time has come for us to admire dunks, emit loud shrieks and weird squeals. So without further exposition, I give you the first Good Ass Games of the 2016-2017 NBA season. Buen Provecho.

          GOOD ASS GAMES OF THE WEEK

Monday

No games scheduled

Tuesday

Utah at Portland (Good Ass Game of The Week)

Expect to see me talk about Utah a lot this season. They have a bunch of interesting players on this year’s roster; including one of my favorites, the infamous Boris Diaw. Portland is already embarking on a Joey Harrington type MVP campaign for Mr. Damien Lillard. This is a late game, but the high I’ll be feeling on Wednesday morning will be worth the lack of sleep. If this don’t turn out to be a Good Ass Game, then my name ain’t Bobby Mickey.

San Antonio at Golden State

This game will be a nice snapshot of what Spurs fans have to look forward to this season. San Antonio will have a great season and will probably grab 50 wins. They will beat the teams they are supposed to, but they will get their asses handed to them by teams with top-tier point guards (they will especially feel the loss of Danny Green in this one). Wins against Cleveland and Golden State will be tough to come by.

Wednesday

Dallas at Indiana

I’m willing to bet any Mavs fan their favorite flavor of Gelato that the Mavs take their first L of the season. Any takers?

Charlotte at Milwaukee

This one is going to be a low-key Good Ass Game. If you miss it, at least watch the highlights. I bet there will be at least 3 top ten plays from this game alone.

Minnesota at Memphis

OOOOWEEEEEE! Teen Wolves go to the grindhouse. Who else is excited for the first appearance of the vein in Tom Thibodeau’s forehead? To quote the great Marv Albert, “YEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”

Sacramento at Phoenix 

File this under TAP THAT VEIN GAMES.

Thursday

Boston at Chicago

This game has the potential to be a snoozer, but I gotta know if this has all been an elaborate Machiavellian plan by Rajon Rondo to get close enough to Dwyane Wade for payback for that time Wade dislocated his arm. If you think I’m not hoping that Rondo gets his revenge, then you don’t understand the depths of my pettiness. I hope Rondo makes Wade’s life a living hell for the duration of this season.

San Antonio at Sacramento

One day, we may finally get to see Boogie Cousins play for a stable organization. Sacramento is still a shit show, but they have just enough good players to make you intrigued.

Los Angeles Clippers at Portland 

This is the real pick to click of the evening. It’s a TNT game, and a 9:30 tip-off. I’ll be lucky to  be able to watch any of this game. But you definitely should if you have cable and you like watching beige acrobatic dudes make fake tough guy faces.

Friday

Phoenix at Oklahoma City

Just for funzies, if you have nothing better to do around this time of the evening, I’d suggest watching the first half, hitting the liquor store, calling in a pickup order, and then getting back home in time to watch the 4th quarter.

Charlotte at Miami

There is a faint buzz surrounding the “Me So Hornets” (I’m sorry I had to) this season as they should be the favorites to win the Southeast division with or without a healthy Michael Kidd-Gilchrist (Holy Shit! I think I’m starting to get excited about the season starting).

Los Angeles Lakers at Utah

In a first for this site, the Salt Lake City Punks have made the Good Ass Games of the Week three times in a week. What better way to spend a Friday night than ingesting legal substances and watching some west coast basketball.

Houston at Dallas

Let’s be honest Dallas fans. This is the year the bottom finally falls out. After years of post 2011 mediocrity, the Mavericks will finally be bad enough to land a lottery pick. Or will they? They are a difference making point guard away from giving teams trouble in April, but for some reason, people don’t like to come to Dallas. Is it because their genius head coach is an asshole? Or is it because the Mavs owner has been piecing together the kind of rosters that NFL Fantasy owners scramble through during bye weeks. Old man Dirk won’t be there for you forever Mark Cuban, the losses are going to come for you, and when they do, they are going to want some cocktail……….FRUIT!!!!!!

Saturday

Minnesota at Sacramento

I’m pretty sure this is an NBATV game so if there is a party or social function you’re getting pressure to attend, do that instead–especially if you have League Pass. This will be one of those games no one talks about, but then you check your Twitter feed, and there will be four or five GIF’s and Vines documenting sick dunks and crazy highlights.

Sunday

Golden State at Phoenix  

I’m curious about how the Suns will play this season. It is weird to see Earl Watson go balling for the UCLA Bruins to coaching an NBA team. It makes me feel old. This probably be the last time I mention the Phoenix Suns this season, unless it is to discuss trade possibilities. They have some young talent on this team, and may be where Utah was 2 seasons ago, unfortunately for Suns fans, ownership can get out of its own way. By February, you may see half of these players playing significant roles for playoff teams.

San Antonio at Miami 

We are finally going to find out if Erik Spoelstra is a good NBA coach. If the Heat win more than 42 games, he may be a candidate for NBA Coach of the Year.

Milwaukee at Detroit

No Reggie, no problem. This game may not get out of the low 90’s, but it should be competitive (in a Princeton-Boston College second round NIT game kind of way). This may be the earliest playoff preview we get this week.

BM

profile pic b mick  Bobby Mickey is the alter ego of writer and poet Edward Austin Robertson. When he isn’t involved in some basketball related activity, actively looking for parties to deejay or venues to perform comedy, he can be found recording podcasts with Craig Stein at Fullsass Studios. Follow him on twitter @clickpicka79. For booking inquiries, send contact info to thisagoodassgame@gmail.com. 

Big Monday

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Happy New Year!

It was good to be back in the home state, getting my hoop fix with the homies.

I had the pleasure of going to see the Timberwolves with a couple of friends from Austin. We drove down to San Antonio and ate at this downtown spot, Josephine Street.  It had everything you would want in a restaurant: good food, cool atmosphere, an attractive waitstaff, and a Spurs superbus for patrons who don’t want to drive to the game (and yes they do in fact, chant “Go Spurs Go!”).

It is a great deal for people not wanting to deal with the parking headache at AT&T, or for those who wanna get trashed on $10.00 beers.

Although a bit out of the way from everything else in San Antonio, the arena itself is a state of the art facility. There isn’t a bad seat in the house, and everything inside serves its function.

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For a ho hum “tap that vein” kind of Monday, with no Tim Duncan, the evening was very entertaining.

For starters, the National Anthem was sung by a man and woman duo of Arab descent, wearing their full garb and Keffiyeh. I thought it was a really beautiful gesture by the Spurs organization to fly in the face of the disturbing anti-Islam stances going on in this country.

We had to eject some University of Oregon football players from our seats, who then continued to seat hop for the duration of the 1st quarter, before finally settling into the nose bleed “comp” seats they were given for playing in the Alamo Bowl.

Speaking of ejections, Popovich, got ejected in the 2nd quarter. We didn’t figure out why until later. He was pretty irate. I’m not sure why, but for some reason the league is not calling defensive 3 seconds. It doesn’t seem like such a stretch for someone like “Pops”, a man who doesn’t care much for the 3 pointer, to lose his shit over a ref blatantly ignoring a rule.

The second half provided some much needed theatre with the highlight of the game being a run led by Boban Marjanovic. The crowd went nuts as he took over down in the post. Every rebound and basket by him, led to an eruption of cheers from the crowd. It started to actually feel like a Spurs game.

The three things I came away with from watching this game were that

1) the Spurs are stacked. This is the deepest Spurs squad that I can remember–especially in the front court with David West, Boris Diaw, Kyle Anderson, and Boban. Their backcourt is pretty nasty too. I’m convinced that Patty Mills and Jonathan Simmons could start for half the teams in the NBA. You put these two on the Bucks and they are suddenly in the playoff hunt again.

 

2)The Silver Dancers are the best basketball dancers in the league. The only set of NBA dancers that give them a run for their money are of course the Hornets’ own squad. Normally the in game timeouts are a chance to crack jokes and make small talk, but our row was quiet. I silently watched this dazzling display of curvy bodies weaving in and out of synchronized lines, and had no qualms about showing my pleasure for what I witnessed. #standingovation

 

3) I’m not a fan of Zach Lavine. We watched this guy shoot six straight crunch time jump shots (four of them missing badly). He never tried to pass once during winning time. He chucked it up soon as he got the ball. He plays like a really poor man’s Russell Westbrook, you know, if Westbrook played like a buster. I’ve got no problem with volume scorers at the point guard position, but if you have Karl Anthony Towns, and Andrew Wiggins, maybe it would be a good idea to get them some touches.

 

This Week’s Slate of Good Ass Games:

 

 

Big Monday

 

Toronto-Cleveland

I don’t care if the east is winning more games than the west. I hate watching teams from the east play ball.

Sacramento-Oklahoma City

No Durant tonight, but Rondo vs. Westbrook sounds good to me.

Orlando-Detroit

This is another one with “Good Ass Game” potential. with two pretty decent backcourts going at it.

Charlotte-Golden State

Man. Its not quite as fluid without Steph in there is it?

Spurs-Milwaukee

Another good one. Spurs will probably blow them out, but it’ll still be worth watching.

Oklahoma-Kansas (Good Ass Game of the Week)

I know I made the NCAA/”Skinemax” analogy a few weeks ago, but its #1 vs. #2, in Allen Fieldhouse on a Monday night. I think it’ll be hype.

 

“Tap that Vein”  Tuesday

 

New York -Atlanta

KP got the “Rookie of the Month” in the Eastern Conference. Big ups to that guy. This will be worth a peep though.

 

Wednesday

 

 

Memphis-Oklahoma City

This could be a more even matchup if Durant isn’t back yet from his sprained toe.

Orlando-Indiana

Gonna be a scrappy affair.

 

Thursday

 

Boston-Chicago

Remember that triple OT game back in the day????

 

 

Friday

 

Cleveland-Minnesota

Teen Wolves are just good enough to stay in games, but not good enough to pull them out in the clutch. Refer again to the above reference about Zach Lavine.

Dallas-Milwaukee

I have been wanting to go watch a Mavericks game all year, and had January 2nd circled on my calendar. Unfortunately the Pelicans have been garbage, so I wasn’t feeling it (in fact they won’t make a Good Ass Game feature until they get my boy “Brow Wow” some help). It turns out the Mavericks played weakkkkkkkkkkkkkk. Only thing worse than the actual playing was the officiating.

New York- San Antonio

Maybe not the “Good Ass Game of the Week”, but I’m excited at the prospect of a Boban vs. Kristaps Porzingis stand off  in the paint for a possession or two.

Golden State- Portland

I’m not sure if Steph will be back, but the potential backcourt matchup has me salivating. By the way, C is for C.J.

 

Saturday

 

Chicago-Atlanta

Jimmy “Buckets!!!!”

Charlotte vs. Los Angeles Clippers

I agree with Rick Fox when he says, “The Clippers are winning again, but they aren’t scaring anybody.”

 

Sunday

 

Dallas-Minnesota

This will be competitive and a fun game.

Milwaukee-New York

I hope the Bucks players can behave themselves in the city that never sleeps. Speaking of strip clubs, if someone were to ask me what location would be provide the best chance for an NBA player and his girlfriend to get robbed while leaving in their Uber, I would have responded with Queens. Frankly, I had no idea there were strip clubs in Queens. I would think they only existed as drug fronts. While I’m at it, big ups to his chick for being a “Ride or Die” kind of gal. Any gal who would accompany their boyfriend to a strip club in Queens, New York, definitely deserves to be the main chick (Iceberg Slim coined a different term for this kind of loyalty in a woman).

Oklahoma City-Portland 

Westbrook vs. the Trailblazers backcourt is going to be fun to watch.

 

Be on the lookout for the newest episode of the Full Sass Podcast We got a chance to get some recording while I was in Texas, it was so much fun that I can’t wait until the next session. Enjoy the games this week, and stay away from sketchy night clubs.

 

Peace,

BM

#thisagoodassgame # fullsass

@clickpicka79

thisagoodassgame@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

THE JUMP OFF

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Its been a busy week for ya boi Bmick: Went to Austin to record a podcast with my Craig on fullsass.com, threw up a couple of blog posts (big ups to my boys Jordan and Alex for blessin’ the game), and last night worked my first private gig as a standup comic (also did my first clean set ever–who knew I had it in me?).

Out of all that activity, the most important thing I did was get that NBA League Pass. Its a game changer no doubt. Now I’m ready for “Tip-off Tuesday” So let’s get it:

TUESDAY

Detroit-Atlanta

Cleveland-Chicago

New Orleans-Golden State

Three good ass games that night. I’m curious how my boy Stanley Johnson plays. I was so hype on Justice Winslow this season that I forgot all about Stanley Johnson being on the Pistons. Detroit has interesting squad. If they were playing out West they’d be trash, but they benefit greatly from being out east. Later on in the season, I will tell you to avoid this game. But its “TIP OFF TUESDAY DAWG!!!!” We ain’t had no basketball in months. You gotta get it in!

Unless you napping, or peeping game 1 of the World Series, you should at least watch the second half of this game. Don’t get too up or down on either team for Cleveland-Chicago game. Media gonna be overreacting the next day no matter who wins. ESPN will have some bullshit narrative to run into the ground, as Bill Plaschke and other talking heads talk about early warning signs for the losing team. GUYS!! GUYS!! GUYS!!! Calm the fuck down. It’s only game 1 of an 82 season.

You best believe I’ll be up late  watching that Golden State-New Orleans game. Coach Gentry getting his ring will be a nice thing to witness for the Pelicans players, but minus Anthony Davis, they really don’t have anything. That is how good “Lil Brow Wow” is. He’s my MVP pick for the year.

Wednesday

Spurs-Thunder (Good Ass Game of the Week) 

I was supposed to work my second job this night, but I can already feel this developing cough coming on. [COUGH COUGH WINK WINK ELBOW NUDGE]

Dallas-Phoenix

Battle for the eighth seed begins.

Cleveland-Memphis

I’m not saying Cleveland is going to punk out, but this going to be a physical game on the 2nd of back-to-backs for the Lebrons. Go ahead and get that ice bath ready fellas. You’re going to need it. Speaking of physical:

Clippers-Kings 

Will be a game chock full of testosterone. If I were a groupie trying to get a meal ticket, this game would be circled on my calendar. There’s some young entrepreneurs holed now in some Sacramento hotel right now, poking holes in condoms and vacuum sealing the packaging.

Minnesota-Los Angeles

This game will be full of cool highlights, but will also have loads of stupid turnovers. This may as well be a Rookies vs. Sophomores game with KG and Kobe as the head coaches. I’ll fight off sleep just long enough to watch the first half. I like to leave the betting to Alex Knapp, but I’ll say that there will be at least 3 insane dunks that makes Sportscenter from this one.

“Tap that Vein Thursday”

You’ll have plenty of opportunities to watch the Pacers play, so unless you really need to see them unveil the

Hickory High uniforms, use the Memphis-Indiana game to be productive.

Side note: Am I the only one who thinks Memphis would be better off playing in the Eastern Conference? They would be beastin’ if they were over there (and they probably should be, they are no longer from Vancouver–also, how many Grizzlies are really in Tennessee?). If they were in the east they’d easily be a top 3 contender.

Dallas-Los Angeles Clippers

I don’t know about this one either. Use Thursday night to build up cache with your loved one. Its early in the season, but every little bit counts. Unless you and your wife are hardcore Mavs fans, and you want to brainwash your infant into being a Mavs fan too, I’d say do something else. Its only the first week. This matchup will mean a lot more as the season moves along.

Friday

Its going to be a busy night for the Mickster. The World Series will have moved to what is currently my favorite American city (Queens representin’), I’ll be showing my face at a Halloween party that night (dressed as you guessed it, an NBA ref), and there are a ton of games.

Houston-Golden State and Miami-Cleveland will be the main attractions, but with NBA League PASS, I can go home and watch the Portland-Phoenix, Lakers-Kings, and Bulls-Pistons games after the fact. #GAMECHANGER

Saturday

Its Halloween. Don’t bother. Golden State-New Orleans play again for the 2nd night in one week, and on the 2nd night of a back-to-back.In fact, everybody plays back  to back on Halloween. Do yourself a favor and go get liquored up and make a bad decision or two (nothing that you can’t videotape or that will get you thrown in jail).

Sunday (First of tha month)

Can you think of a better way to nurse a hangover than to watch the Spurs beat the Celtics?

Houston-Miami won’t be a bad watch either, and you could do worse things than tune in to Milwaukee-Toronto.

Monday

Oklahoma City-Houston

Runner-up to the Good Ass Game of the Week.

Memphis-Golden State

“YUP!!!!”

~E-40

Portland-Minnesota and Suns-Clippers 

are worth checking out during timeouts and commercials, but honestly the highlights will be better than the games themselves. No disrespect to the fan base of either franchises, but you know what it is.

Big Ups of the Week to:

Jerry Colangelo USA basketball committee for finally doing what is right. Gregg Popovich has done as much for the game of basketball as anyone not named James Naismith. This is a win for everyone involved, but most of all this is a win for the game of basketball. I’m getting choked up just writing about this. Big ups!

So that’s it. The NBA season starts on Tuesday, and I couldn’t be happier. Basketball season is finally here. GOOD NEWS. GOOD NEEEEWWWWWWWWHHHHHHOOOOOOSSSSSSS.

Shout out to the Mets and the Royals for what will be a classic World Series. I think the Royals will take it in 7. I’ll be happy for either fan base no matter who wins. Although,I’ll just be more happier Mets fans. Kansas City is in Missouri after all. And we all know how I feel about that state.

Be cool.

Bobby Mickey

@clickpicka79

#thisagoodassgame

fullsass.com

bobbymickey@gmail.com